Moving Forward

Depressed? Probably. Needing to move forward? Definitely.

My husband didn't ask for us to move. He was lucky to have a job, it could always be worse. At least that is what I kept telling myself.

Ben needed a mother. He needed someone who wasn't mopeing around feeling sad all the time. The moments were passing me by and I was letting them.

Thank god for my friends. I wasn't the only one who had feelings like this after they had a baby. "If it lasted forever, none of us would have another one" True, true. So the house went up for sale after many tears and arguements. We went to my graduation at Duke over Mother's Day. It was a great time to see all the nursing school girls. I even got to see friends from the Duke ICN at dinner one night. I knew a large challenge was looming when we returned home from NC. I had about 3 weeks of maternity leave left and I had to go in to work and tell them, we would be moving.
I struggled with going back at all since I told Tony that I would be agreeable to moving in August. I had 2 jobs. One was per diem in the NICU and the other I had just started as the educator on the mother baby unit. Like, literally just startedin February. It was a great set up too. I worked 40 hours during a pay period. Had my own hours. So, I went in and talked to my boss and basically told her I could come back if she wanted, if she thought it was worth it. So back I went. I worked Mondays, Wednesdays and every other Thursday. My mom, Crissy and Karen watched Ben. I couldn't wait to get home to Ben every day.
He was such a good baby. He slept through the night at 8 weeks. He napped well (once I put him in his own room). He smiled and laughed and loved it when his daddy came home. We did not love running out of the house when there was a showing and driving around for an hour. But, we were some of the lucky ones. The house sold in a month. Mostly due to the fact that Wiechert relocation company owned us. They dictated the price the house could be listed, which was not much. That was frustrating since we had only owned the place for 1 year. But, at least it sold.